Last season I had those reindeer names memorized and I'm almost certain Dude is not one of them!

Catch phrases. You have to love them. We teach them to our children. See you later alligator. After while crocodile. They do help to spice up our communications, don't you think? My twin granddaughters recently pointed out that I've started calling everyone dude when I am talking to them. I've never done that before. Where did it come from? They also asked why I say, "I'll holler at you later.", when I end a telephone conversation. At least they are listening. They seemed to think it was particularly funny, especially the hollering part. But how are all you dudes and dudesses doing out there today? Okay. So the feminine designation doesn't work but at least I tried. It is Tuesday, August 2, 2010, and we are off and running or off and stumbling but we are at least, off. You say you knew the being 'off' part fit me pretty much on most days. At least there seems to be consensus on some things. But that's okay, dude. Just for the record, I am going to try to begin to think about trying to limit my use of that nickname. I've tried to think what I was calling people before dude came into the picture. I believe I may have used buddy as in "Okay, buddy, I'll holler back at you later." Maybe I am in a time warp where my linguistics are being fed from my inner CB radio personality. Remember when all of that was popular? "Hey good buddy, got your ears on?"

When I was over in Louisiana the other day dad took be out to the Fort Polk Army post to look at some of the new developments there. They have a brand new shopping center and I could tell they are prospering with many new construction projects underway. We toured the PX (shopping center) and it was very nice. However, as he and I walked around, I could tell how out of place I must have seemed to the soldiers and their families. Here they were with their high and tight haircuts and here I was with my Santa beard in progress. I did get some stares and since it was still July I doubt anyone thought Christmas when they saw me. They most likely guessed that maybe I was one of the Afgan role players from their training exercises or perhaps just a poor soul looking for a handout. Speaking of Santa, I received my first inquiry for a professional gig at one of the big hotels in our area, coming up in November. They want me to show up at a couple of ginger bread workshops and be a part of their program. They had received my number from the fast food chain I worked with last year. I will most likely do it but I still need to finalize my fees and get back to them. Sounds like fun? That's the part I'm trying to figure out. My wife used the word fantastic when I told her about it. Sounds suspicious to me.

I suppose you do know that receiving that phone call about me showing up as Santa has to put me in a fairly small class of folks. You don't think so? How many times have you been called and asked to do this? Or, how many people do you know, other than me, who were called to show up as Santa? Okay. See, I told you. Another instance of where I get to be either a giant among pygmies or a pygmy among giants. And don't forget the counter guy at Wataburger did tell me that I looked like I might be a good candidate to be a Santa. He continued to advise me to consider this even as I tried to tell him that I was the 'real' Santa already. But, we get our encouragement wherever we can find it. I most likely called him dude and maybe that was part of the problem. I know some of you prefer not to talk about the Christmas season until December while others have already finished your shopping. I've heard about people who do all their shopping after Christmas for the next season but later can't remember what they did with the presents or when they find them they can't remember who they bought them for. And, you think I have a problem. But that's okay friend. It does take all kinds and I know of no one that proves this to be true more so than yours truly. Friend. Now I may have just found a good substitute for dude and buddy. Neighbor? Maybe not. Friend. Sounds good to me dude. But as you can tell I still have some work to do. Until next time I want all of you to be good boys and girls because I can see you when you're sleeping. That reminds me. Could you turn down the volume a little on that chin music you play when you are sleeping? Ho! Ho! Have a great day and may God bless! Amen. ....More later.