Welcome back to our long running series, 'Another Day Older', where we seek to tackle many of the mysteries that surround our day by day living. Today is the 1900th time we've met this way and this one falls on
Tuesday, October 21, 2014, where I'm fixated on some of life's enigmas. If McDonald's is truly the all-American fast food joint, why don't they serve hotdogs? Is there really any way to know which armrest belongs to you in a movie theater? Why are there no 'B' batteries? How do the police handcuff a one armed man? If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other do they still call it a dog pile? Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions? What happens if you daydream at night? What is a picture containing 1,000 words worth? Are short people able to talk down to a tall person? What is the actual speed that hot cakes sell? Can a cemetery blame a cost increase on the high cost of living? If Wile E. Coyote can afford to pay for all the stuff bought from Acme, why doesn't he just buy himself some dinner? Why is it they play at a recital but they recite at a play? Do people in England eat English muffins or do they just call them muffins? If a deaf person goes to court do they still call it a hearing? When pigs exert themselves is it possible for them to pull their hamstring? What do the people in China call their best dinnerware? And one last one for today: How do you know when you have run out of invisible ink?
Okay. For you purists, I am aware that at one time they did have 'B' batteries. They were used for particular devices but their size and convenience quickly faded as technology changed. There may be a few still in use in Europe but for the most part only collectors have them today. What's that? You really don't care one bit about 'B' batteries? You do know you have to work with me if I am to make this daily visit a productive one. Audience participation is required. Yes. I am very aware of how handy your delete button is, but I would appreciate it if you would refrain from veiled and unveiled threats. Just kidding. I'm just messing around and I well understand that not every topic appeals to every person. It's how you roll and it's how I roll. We are all wired up differently. I've heard people go on and on about a TV show they think to be hilarious. I tried to watch it but found it not to be in the least bit funny and from my way of seeing it, it was unwatchable. All I could figure out was that maybe I missed that day of school where they taught how some of that stuff was supposed to be humorous. I do know that you know what I mean.
I suppose I am in one of my moods today. (As if I am not in one every day!) But, I just read an article that might help explain why I'm sometimes all over the page all at the same time. It seems that some scientific researchers have correlated folks who have mood swings with the time of year they were born. The most mood swinging of all? Those born in summer. That puts me right smack dab into the middle of August, but, my mom does remind me that right after I was born they experienced a freak cold front that came through and she had to light a heater to keep me warm. They didn't mention that in their study. It does make one wonder how valid their findings are. They also never even called me. (It would have been a long distance call from Budapest, Hungary.) There you go. For those inquiring minds that want to know, Spring was the second season most responsible for mood swings with Autumn and Winter being less so. Just another investigative endeavor on my part as I continue my quest to determine exactly how I came to be so messed up. I hope you know that I am joking because the Bible makes it very clear that each one of us are messed up and in need of a Savior. The Good News is that God has given us Jesus as the way to be made right with Him. And, we don't have to do a study to know the veracity of that truth. We have God's Word on it!
Amen. ....More later.
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