Thursday, October 1, 2015

"Sometimes writing badly can lead to something. Not writing at all leads to nothing." ~ (copied)

Knock Knock. Who's there? Alaska. Alaska who? Well, Alaska someone else because I obviously don't have a clue. It's way too early for you to start throwing fruit at the blogger. That's called an icebreaker or opening. You know. A little funny. I got it. Very little. Oh well, how's everything going as we take on this brand new day and brand new month on this Thursday, October 1, 2015? You know what they say. To steal ideas from one person is called plagiarism, to copy from many is called research. Okay. Let me try this one. Talk is cheap, that is, until you hire a lawyer. Maybe you like this flavor. Support bacteria, because, think about it, it's the only culture some people have. Still not satisfied? I drive way too fast to worry about my cholesterol. As you can tell I'm just doing fillers at the moment. I am actually in the process of working on something that will be much more meaningful. I just don't have a clue what it is at the moment. There are entire days that go like that sometime. It can be quite challenging but you've probably noticed that I have had significant experience in this arena. Maybe the paragraph up around the bend will be better. There's always hope. I leave you with this: "May you have the hindsight to know where you've been, the foresight to know where you are going, and the insight to know when you have gone too far." (Irish Pledge)

Here's something you can use when you get one of those annoying telemarketing calls: "I can’t take your call right now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don’t remember. I’d appreciate it if you could help me out by telling me my name and sharing something about myself. Thanks." Here's one about Adam and Eve. It's just a joke so don't get all stirred up about it. ~ Adam was walking around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked him,  "What is wrong with you?" Adam said he didn’t have anyone to talk to. God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He said, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing she’ll wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you’ve had a disagreement. She will always freely give you love and passion. Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?" God replied, "An arm and a leg." Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?" The rest is history ….. ~

Since I've not been able to make contact with that part of my mental process that engages thoughts and translates them into words on the electronic page, I'll leave you with this last little funny. The fellow received a letter from his grandmother and here's what she had to say: ~ The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a "honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir practice followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy, I’m glad I did. What an uplifting experience that followed. I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is…and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked I’d never have noticed. I found that LOTS of people love Jesus! Why, while I was sitting there the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then leaned out of his window and screamed "For the love of GOD! GO! GO! GO!" What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking. I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love. All of these people were really excited. I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked your teenage brother in the back seat if he knew what that meant. He said that it was probably a Hawaiian signal for good luck or something. Well, I never met anyone from Hawaii so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. Your brother burst out laughing…why he too was enjoying this religious experience. A couple of people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended but this is when I noticed the light had changed. So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers and drove on through the intersection before the light changed again. I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away. Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks! Love, Grandma. ~ The stories I used today were copied but not attributed, therefore, I updated them a little for my blog. Maybe tomorrow I'll have something from my own attic. Until then may our Great God bless one and all. Amen. ....More later.

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