Wednesday, October 19, 2016

"Been there, done that, but then I went back and did it again because I am a slow learner." ~ copied

Good morning and welcome to Wednesday, October 19, 2016. While I may be 70 years old, I am still capable of doing some pretty stupid things. Last Friday I picked up something I shouldn't have. It was way too heavy. Once I got it up I refused to sit it down until I carried it to its destination. That was not very smart. It didn't immediately cause me a lot of grief but on Saturday afternoon I suddenly had the feeling that I had been run over by a freight train. It took me a little while to connect the dots because of the delayed reaction but once I did I had to remember the rule I gave to our boys growing up. You can't complain about self-inflicted problems. By the way, that didn't keep it from hurting like I had been beaten with a tire tool. My wife is always very clear in her assessment. Her analysis, "Stuff like that infuriates me." I told her that I would do my best to not do that one again. You know. The old Hee Haw joke. "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responds, "Well, then don't do it!" I am happy to report that I am some better. Some. There's enough pain left to keep my promise to do better very much on the front burner. But, the pain is fading. You know. The medical folks always ask how much pain on a scale of 1 to 10. Where I come from the scale was, it hurts like old billy heck down to a dull roar. The fact that I am getting better makes me thankful. And, yes, I did thank God for that but even though I felt like I should, I haven't apologized to Him for not using my head for something other than a hat rack. (That's how Paw Paw used to put it.)

They tell us that an even stronger cold front will be here by Friday. Yesterday, the high temperature in one location in the general area was 94. Yikes, it's only 12 days until November. I saw that front pictured on the national weather map. It's still some ways off. You can go ahead and pull out a sweater if you want to, but, I think I will wait it out. We hear about conspiracy theories every day in the political world. Well, what about the conspiratorial efforts being put forth by the weather people? They are hawking this one: "We could be in the upper 40's by Saturday morning." I've got a response to that. What about the 'unexpected wind shift', 'the slow down of the system', or 'it ran out of steam before it got here' excuses. Sorry. But, I've been at this a long time. To add injury to insult they are encouraging people to look forward to sitting outside in the cool air while enjoying their coffee. Now they have moved into the meddling territory and they might well hope their projections do come true. If not, we all know what will happen. They will be back in their same slot selling the same stuff next week. Sorry. I just felt like these things needed to be aired again, for the umpteenth time. One site that gave a lot of the technical gobbly gook for why forecasters get it wrong did add an interesting caveat. It had to do with the forecaster doing a little wishcasting instead of sticking to the proven models. Ah ha! Wishcasting. Don't say I didn't tell you. And I add for our enlightenment, my insight, the selling of sweaters and jackets.

That's all in fun because when all else fails we can always complain about the weather and those who do the forecasting. Here are a few weather related funnies from the Readers Digest website to end our time together for today. ~  "As we waited for a bus in the frosty weather, the woman next to me mentioned that she makes a lot of mistakes when texting in the cold. I nodded knowingly. 'It’s the early signs of typothermia.'" Phil Noyes, Yakima, Washington ~ "How hot was it? It was so hot in Beverly Hills, people were frying egg whites on the sidewalk." Comedian Matt Wohlfarth ~ "It’s been raining so much in Los Angeles that the Chia Pet I threw in the garbage is now blocking my entire driveway." Jay Leno ~ "Why does moisture destroy leather? When it’s raining, cows don’t go up to the farmhouse yelling, 'Let us in! We’re all wearing leather! We’re going to ruin the whole outfit here!'" Jerry Seinfeld ~ "Don’t knock the weather. If it didn’t change once in a while, nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation." Kin Hubbard ~ I think I certainly prove the last point in my rantings about weather prognosticators. But, that's just me. I do hope you have a most wonderful rest of the day. Be careful out there. Some of that stuff is too heavy. May God bless each one. Amen. ...More later.

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