Welcome to my three paragraph circus. Something for everyone!

It is now officially Tuesday, April 19, 2011 and I have some good news for you. Last week on the 12th we celebrated Tax Freedom Day. You never heard of it? That's the day that we here in America, the average tax payer, pays all the taxes owed for the year: state, local, and federal. This means that, in 2011, on average, we work for nearly 3 and 1/2 months just to pay all the taxes we owe. I didn't notice it either or I could have led us all in a chorus based on the song sung by the dwarfs in Snow White, "I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go!" I don't think too many of us have any trouble with the fact that we are super blessed in being born here in this great nation. It's not that we must pay taxes that causes most of us trouble. It's the way in which our government operates and it is how our tax dollars are spent that causes us grief. Think about it. Time after time it has been proven that one can give all their same income information to any number of tax preparers and get different outcomes from each one. That tells the story of the sorry state of the tax code that we have to abide by. I use a computer program to prepare my return. I've only had to seek outside assistance once or twice in my over forty five years of filing returns. But we all know there are ways to finesse the code and take advantage of the system. Many years ago a lady who worked for me told me her tax preparation person had advised her to fudge on some of her deductions because they would most likely be under the audit radar. One of the areas they suggested was to bump up the amount claimed as donations to the Church. See what I mean? Is it any wonder that folks doubt the credibility of our current system? I read this morning that we now have 50% of households who pay no federal income taxes. That's a remarkable statistic but I thank God that I do pay federal taxes and I am able to do so because He has blessed me with a job along with the health to get up and go each day. Amen.

I finally did it. I didn't want to do it but I finally did. A relationship broken after nearly twenty five years, but it had to be done. I cancelled my cable and had a satellite system installed.  I didn't want a parabala dish mounted on my house. I now have one. I didn't want to go through all the hassle of installing new equipment and learning a new system, but you can only be unhappy with service for a reasonable period of time and I think I have done my part in staying with them for twenty five years. I did satellite communications back in the day at the big company and I was quite surprised that while they have improved the technology in some ways, it basically works about the same. You must have a clear line of sight and that can be interfered with by things like trees and we are blessed to still have quite a few trees, therefore, we had some issues finding the right spot for the dish. Learning a new remote control is like trying to answer some of the obscure questions asked on the program, "Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?" We have a remote for the surround sound system. We have a remote to turn on the television and to make adjustments to it. We have a remote for the satellite channels. We have a remote for the Blu Ray DVD player. We have a remote for the non Blu Ray DVD player. We have a portable telephone system where you can walk around with the handset when you are on a call. Sometimes all of these devices including the phone are all laid up together in the same area. My wife's lap top is connected right at her recliner and if we throw our cell phones into the mix, I can hardly wait to see which one we try to answer when something makes a noise. I know I've heard her call from the kitchen for someone to answer the phone and I've had to tell her it was on the commercial. Oh well.

That should just about do it in terms of my efforts to simplify our lives as we get ready to slow down and relax a little. But, we had this rule when the boys were growing up that if the pain is self inflicted you give up the right to complain. So, I would suppose what you are hearing is not a complaint but rather an extended explanation. Those rules are much easier to make for others and also easier to enforce. This past Sunday morning I was alone on the Church property but still embarrassed when I found myself hearing someone talking only to find out it was my shoes squeaking. You know you are going to have a long day when you find yourself trying to answer your squeaky shoes. That led me to a thought about a series that I am adding to my 'To Do" list. The series would be funny jokes and stories about older folks and each one would begin with the trademark: "You might be an Oldneck if ......" You might be an Oldneck if you have ever had to open your medicine bottle with a pair of Vise-grips. You might be an Oldneck if you have ever worn your clothes in the shower because the tag said 'wash and wear'. Okay. So, it might not compete with the redneck stuff from Jeff Foxworthy but I'm not going to give up on the idea. It's right there with the few hundred other ideas that I will be working on before you know it. Until then try to have yourself a wonderful day and don't let anyone catch you talking to your shoes. May God bless. Amen.             .....More later.