Doctor these pills you gave me for BO... What's wrong with them? They keep slipping out from under my arms!

It all happened so fast. It was like a blur. It appeared and before I knew it, it was gone. I'm not talking about seeing a UFO. I'm describing how quickly the weekend, as it is called, got away from us. As it is called because I'm sure we all are aware that Sunday is not the end of the week, it is the beginning, the first day, and that's why we always try to start the first day of the week off by meeting up with other believers to worship God together and to study His word. We had a great family gathering on Saturday evening, a wonderful birthday celebration, and a busy Sunday. Now it is get ready for the upcoming work week here on Monday, August 8, 2011. I'm all fasted up this morning and ready to visit my new doctor at 9 a.m. There were many doctors to choose from in the booklet they sent me. How did I pick this one? I used the internet. That's right. This doctor has a huge number of patients and they have these sites that rate doctors based on patient input. This 35 year old internal medicine fellow was the only one who had 5 stars in all categories and no complaints and a huge number of complimentary notes. You don't think that's a good way to choose a doctor? May not be but the good news is that under my new managed care plan I can change and go with another one for my next visit. Hopefully that will not be necessary but we shall see, and I'm sure it will, at the very least, be good for a story or two.

Maybe to break the ice I will tell him a Santa joke or two. Maybe he is into Cajun humor. I could read or attempt to read for him the Cajun version of the Night Before Christmas. What's that? You have never heard it either? Okay then. There are many different ones to choose from but here's one I found:

Ho Ho Ho on de Bayou

Wuz de night befo' Chrisma, wit de moon big lak jumbo,
Us Cajun was stirrin' a big pot o' gumbo.
Sock we sho got, but we don' got no shoes.
De cillern all cover good down on de flo'
Wit moss onderneat, so dey don' get so soe.
Mama at de chimney is roastin' de ham
An boilin' de couboulliion, and bakin' de yam.
Wen out on de bayou, dey go such a clatter
Man, it soun' lak Gros Boudreaux don fall off a ladder.
Ah run lak a rabbit to get to de do',
Trip on de dog and fall on de flo'.
As ah look out de do' in de light of de moon,
Ah tink, Man, you crazy, or you goin' be soon!
Cuz dere on de bayou, wen ah stretch mah neck stiff
Ah see eight alligator, and dey pullin' a skiff.
Dem gator wuz swift, down de bayou dey came,
As' de driver he holla and call dem by name:
"Haw, Comeaux!, Haw Boudreaux!, Fontenont and Alcide!
Gee Phydeaux!, Gee Thibodeaux!, Alphonse and Pladide!
To the top of de poch, to de top of de wall,
Crawl up dere, Alligator, and be so' you don' fall!"
Lak dat up de poch de alligator dey climb
With a skiff full of playtings and Sait Nicklas behin'.
Den on top ob de chimney ah hear a big "BAM!"
When Sait Nicklas he fall "sit-first" on de yam.
"Sacre Bleu," he say, "Ah bet my pants got a hole
Where ah set dem down on dem big red-hot coal!"
He wuz dress all in muskrat, from him head to him foot
An' his clos' is all cover wit ashes and soot.
A sack full of playtings he t'row on his back,
He look lak a criminal, an' dat's fo' a fack!
His eye how dey chine, his dimple how merry!
His cheeck lak rad roses, his nose lak a cherry.
He have white hair on his chin, and a big fat belly
Dat shake wen he laff, lak de strawberry jelly.
A wink ob his eye an' a shake ob his han',
Ah gayrontee, ah lak dis fat man!
He don' do no talkin', an got rat to work,
Put playtings in socks and den turn wit a jerk.
He put bot' his han' on top ob his head,
He look at de chimney, and den he done said:
"Wif all dat dere fire, and dem red hot yam
Ah don' go back up dat way again!"
So he run out de do' and clime on de roof,
He jump in his skiff, and he crack his big whip.
Man, dem alligator, dey MOVE, and dey do not slip!
An ah hear him holla as down de bayou he go,
"Merry Chrisma! Merry Chrisma!" till ah see him no mo'.

I suppose that's enough damage for one day. If you have trouble reading that little story, call up some reruns of Justin Wilson's Cajun cooking show on YouTube. He will get you into the mood and also help you in this beautiful dialect. It's okay to know a second language and it will serve you well when you visit South Louisiana. Here's a 10 minute sample:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eK4umRMJlrs
If it's not clicakable , just copy and paste it into Google. I'll let you know how things go at the doctor's office. You heard what? They also have the right to refuse any new patient and I had better keep that in mind. Don't go getting me all nervous and make my blood pressure go up. Of course the doctor may have a joke or two of his own. He could tell me one like this: "A man goes to the doctor for an exam. After reviewing the results the doctor comes back to the exam room and says 'I've got some bad news, you have ten to live'. The patient is alarmed and says 'Doc, ten, ten what?' The doctor says 'nine, eight, seven.......'" No. I agree. That's not very funny but life is and we might as well laugh because it really is good medicine, for whatever ails you. Until next time, may God bless. Amen.      .....More later.