“Housework won't kill you, but then again, why take the chance?” ― Phyllis Diller

Good morning and welcome to the life and times of a man dealing with all the issues faced in life while his wife is away helping to care for his mother. It's Tuesday, April 4, 2017. Welcome. After Church on Sunday, I determined to get caught up on my chores. These are not typically 'my' chores but with the domestic goddess gone for nine days now, the voice of necessity crying in the wilderness had to be answered. There's always decisions to be made. Do I make the bed or do I make the bed look like something was done to it? I started the latter but ended up having to make it anyway after making such a mess out of the fake deal. Got all the dishes washed. I think I did about four loads of clothes. Washing, drying, hanging them up, folding, putting them away. Whew! When I talked to her on the phone at about 5 p.m. and told her I needed someone to come in to help me with all of my tasks, she couldn't help herself. I get how she let out a huge LOL, but did she have to add the loud sound effects? Well, thank you very much. When I was doing the clothes I noticed that a lot of them were hers. Before I could even think about it, it dawned on me. Every time she does the clothes a lot of them are mine. Man! I hate it when it works out like that. I couldn't help but think, where did all these towels come from? What do these grandkids think we are running here? Some kind of motel or what? Sorry. Just trying to get the hang of my inner domestic mindset. Get it right. I was not trying to get in touch with my feminine side. Whatever in the world that means.

I know she will get a kick out of reading about my travails. She reads my blogs when she gets up and typically sends me a note afterwards. She is very well aware how much she is missed. Not just by our immediate family but she has a wide circle of friends and they too are missing her being here. She, however, is conflicted. She knows she is needed at home but she also sees a need for assistance in mom's situation. I am glad that she is sensitive to the needs of others, especially when it comes to my mom. Meanwhile, I will soldier on, so to speak. I think we've just about warmed up everything at the house that can be warmed up. I probably need to drop by the store and pick up a few things. I've been saying that for several days now. Navigating the traffic on the way home is not so easy. I think I had several other pretty decent excuses but they escape me at this particular time. I'll have to check my excuse book. I've been meaning to index that resource to make it easier to use. No. I do not have an excuse book. Not a printed one. Is there a file labeled as such somewhere upstairs in my noggin? I can't be 100% sure but honesty compels me to say I wouldn't put it past me.

She did cook a meal while I was there last Saturday. Everyone seemed to enjoy it. You don't have to wonder if I enjoyed it or not. She even had made banana pudding for dessert. That's my girl! If it is true that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, she has a whole lot longer of a journey in my current condition than she did a few years ago. As my grandfather would have said it, "Son, looks like you've swollen up since the last time I saw you." He did not have the gift of subtlety. I can't be sure exactly what has caused this recent weight gain. It's like I crossed a threshold of some kind. I'm working on a list of suspects right now. I think I've used the Santa Claus needs a belly already. According to the online version of Prevention Magazine, here are the 6 lamest excuses people use for not doing something about it, 1) I'm too busy. 2) Healthy food is too expensive. 3) Diets make me hungry. 4) I don't have time to cook. 5) Exercise makes me too tired. 6) I always gain the weight back. I didn't read all the solutions that followed each of these excuses because my eyes were tired. I do need to think some about each of them to see if any of them ring a bell with me. Thanks for showing up today. It's time for a short break. Does anyone know if there's any of the banana pudding left? See you next time and may God bless us all. Amen. ....More later.

“One flesh they are; and one flesh, so I'd guess, Has but one heart, come grief or happiness.” ― Geoffrey Chaucer, (1343-1400), known as the father of English literature.

Is it Monday already? I wanted to make sure this was not an April Fool's hangover. It does feel like Monday. I think the fellow on the radio said it was, therefore, I am going to accept his report, this one being, April 3, 2017. I spent Saturday over in Louisiana and I bring back a report of progress, albeit, slow and steady, with regards to my mom. First and foremost, she is beginning to express at times how she is feeling better. My wife is making a difference there. I can tell. She and JoAnn working with dad have made a good team in helping mom begin to begin to recover. I very much thank God for His working in this situation. That presents some very mixed feelings on my part. I miss having the wife here with me. She is my help-mete as the old King James called Eve. That Hebrew designation involved how Eve was fitted or appropriate for Adam in that she completed him. I guess that means when she isn't here with me I'm running around with an incomplete stamped on my forehead. On the other hand, she is doing God's work where she is and she enjoys honoring my mom by serving her needs. The thought of that brings tears to my eyes and makes me especially thankful for her. Given all of that, I do have a thought that is permanently affixed to my 24x7 day: Come home soon!

The term jaded is used today to describe a certain type of fatigue. One modern summation put it this way: "The end result of having a steady flow of negative experiences, disappointment, and unfulfillment fed into a person where they get to the point where their anger circuits just sort of burn out and they accept disillusionment." Look around. It's widespread. Politics, the economy, relationships, health, and life in general, all can be downers when they present so many challenges. It is so easy to become downhearted to the point of developing a critical and negative spirit. How do I know so much about this subject? I have multiple inputs that inform me. Three in particular. Me, myself, and I. One thing I can be certain of, God does not intend for His own to live in this type of debilitating lifestyle. Since all of those things I listed may not get better, then there has to be another source that informs our spirit. That would be growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus, the Christ. (2nd Peter 3:18) The bottom line is to think about the role of truth, the source of truth, and the overcoming power of truth in the life of those who are children of the living God. Again, Jesus said, "I am the way and the truth and the life." (John 14:6) This means in a world seemingly always upside down and going in the wrong direction, I need, you need, we all need, more input from Jesus and less from the world. I had something in mind when I started this paragraph but it more or less took on a life of its own.  

In case you didn't have any April Fool's Day foolery, here are a few quips that may or may not be giggle-worthy. ~ I stayed up all night to see where the sun went but it finally dawned on me. ~ A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'. ~ I've had many jobs. I couldn't concentrate in an orange juice factory; wasn't suited to be a tailor; Muffler factory was just exhausting; couldn't cut it as barber; wasn't noteworthy as a musician; did not have patience to be a doctor; didn't fit in the shoe factory; job at the pool maintenance company was too draining; and I found out there was no future as a historian. ~ Does anyone know why dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. ~ At least drug stores understand life. That's why the anniversary and sympathy cards are side by side. ~  Ninety-eight percent of cross-eyed teachers have difficulty controlling their pupils. ~ I know. Some of them are more gag-worthy than giggle-worthy, but, I did waste several minutes finding them on about a dozen different sites and message boards. Maybe at least one of them brought a small upturn of the lips. Even that can help. Some. Enjoy your day and may God bless us all is my prayer. Amen. ...More later.

I finally found a game to play on my semi-intelligent phone.

I actually made it to Friday, March 31, 2017. I will be going to visit my mom tomorrow. Dad too. Also, my sister JoAnn. And, one of the main attractions, my bride of nearly 53 years. She has decided to extend for another few days to help with some doctor related visits coming up next week. A couple of months ago I set aside my flip phone because she passed down to me her old smartphone, an Apple 4. I use it to text her, forth and back. I can also check Facebook with it. I have never played a game on it, except for one. That's the one where I can immediately block a scam call of any kind. I think I've blocked more than a dozen so far and I actually love to get those calls so I can hang them up and block that number. I know. They can use a different number to call on another day. Good for them! Because I am waiting and watching. When they do, it's slam bing bam, and they are B-L-O-C-K-E-D. I've already noticed a significant decrease in scam call activity. That means I am winning the game. There's some dude who used to have the number I have today. Many folks have been trying to reach him for a long time. They call me often. After telling them I am not now Mr. Hines, I have not been him in the past, and I do not intend to be him in the future, I say so long and goodbye because I engage the blocker function immediately. Sometimes I get a little giddy knowing they will no longer show up on my tiny little screen. When they get the message I'm not the party to whom they are speaking they can be very persistent. "Do you know how we can reach Mr. Hines?" No clue. "That's okay, while I have you on the line maybe I could interest you in our service." I don't know what sound is made when they are blocked but it must be a lovely tune.

I am well aware that my gaming experience is not equal to something like those who are committed to 2016's most popular game, Pokémon GO. At least I assume that to be the case since I have no personal experience to compare to. I know the wife plays several different games. One is a puzzle piece game. I'm not sure about the others but I do know they require her undivided attention when she is playing them. I did make it home from Wednesday Bible study in time to watch the final episode of Duck Dynasty. It was a fitting farewell to their more than 130 plus episodes since coming on the scene in 2005. I will watch the reruns. I mean I already am watching the reruns on one of the outdoor channels, four of them back to back to back to back on Monday evenings. I read one of the most hate filled, scathing, good riddance assessments of their series in the online version of Rolling Stone Magazine. Their critic's take is the worst television program in history with the worst people, the worst family, and the worst stories has finally come to an end. I wonder why someone writing for that particular magazine would hate everything about the Robertson Clan? If you can't figure that one out, send me a private message and I will do my best to explain it to you. That angry writer was way overheated, maybe like Si would say, "A redneck walkin' into Bass Pro Shops gets more excited than a 12-year-old girl going to a Justin Beaver concert."

It takes me a little bit of getting ready to get ready for that nearly 400 mile round trip on Saturday, but, I am anxious to see them all. I do hope the lady who is still needing training wheels on her passing approach will stay home tomorrow. I also hope the big box store will schedule their product delivery during the week when I am not on their highway. Those two requests will help. Some. What's that? Maybe I could get a police escort? I realize that's being facetious, but to tell the truth, I'm not sure they would drive fast enough to suit me. I have no idea why I said that. I had to have been kidding on that one. Some. A little. Just a wee bit. I can tell I ran out of something to write about some time ago but I kept at it anyway. I do hope that you will have a great Saturday and Lord's Day Sunday. Si Robertson not only makes jokes but he also gives some sound life advice, like this one, "In the winter, things are dead and dull, but then there is an explosion of life. That's what He promises people who believe in His Son. That's what all the Robertsons are banking on." ~  Me too! See you next time. Lord willing. Amen. ....More later.

"In Essentials Unity, In Non-Essentials Liberty, In All Things Charity." Often attributed to others, it appears to have been coined by an obscure theologian, Rupertus Meldenius, in 1617

Good morning and welcome. Today is Thursday, March 30, 2017. I grabbed that photo off of a Twitter posting where the fellow was drawing attention to some of the in-house debates that take place within Churches and other religious forums. I thought his point to be well taken. Let me be clear. In my opinion, there are things that a person should be willing to go to the mat for, to use the picture as a metaphor, and there are others that don't really amount to much. Knowing the difference between those two clearly impacts our fellowship and connectedness. In my own case, my three score and ten plus years have taught me a few things. When I was younger I was ready to take on any and all challenges to my limited viewpoints involving Scripture. What have I learned? I don't really know so much, after all. A buddy of mine growing up was Pentecostal. I am a lifelong Baptist. Being either of those will not get someone into heaven, but, he and I used to stay up all night debating the differences between the two practices. I even consulted my pastor who gave me a book very appropriately titled, "Once a Pentecostal, Now a Baptist." I read it and then gave it to my buddy. Some of the things we argued about were not inconsequential. They involved how a sinner can be made right with God. (Worth debating.) Others, not so much, like whether girls should wear makeup or not. See what I mean? My point is that we should always major on the majors because when we beat each other up over stuff where the truth is unclear, we end up both being beat up and typically sore; physically, mentally, and emotionally. That is usually not conducive to brotherly love. Something I learned along the way.

While I've done my fair share of slipping and sliding around, I am still actively engaged in the practice of my faith, as God has provided. As far as I know, sadly, my old buddy threw his away some 30 or more years ago. That's not a commentary on our debates as teenagers, it's more of how life unfolds. He has had to deal with his troubles and I have had to deal with mine. He is known to be a very soured up, cranky, and some say, even, a mean old man. While I have my moments, hopefully, I'm not known for those character traits. At the same time, I have no doubt that there may be some who could say I've mishandled my attitude and testimony during my sojourn here. The bottom line is always what we believe about God and what that belief brings about in our life. Our class is currently engaged in a verse by verse examination of Genesis on Sunday mornings. Those individuals we are studying about who were singled out as being faithful had their flaws, their failings, and their lapses in their walk with God. Yet, their belief in God always brought them back to their connection to Him, and that, my friend, is a picture of our struggle to live as He would want us to. The truth? All believers. All. Struggle. In one way or another. The even better news? God was faithful to those we are studying about even when they were not, and, He is the same way with us today. Something I learned along the way.

That wrestling photo made me a little homesick for when I was a kid and we watched them toss each other around the ring. Not enough to make me watch it again, but, you will have to admit, that's a large number crowded into that particular ring. I wonder what a group of wrestlers is called. Maybe a melee. Maybe not. There are people who still defend the professional wrestling you see on TV as being legitimate. One fellow said that only in America will you find people who believe the moon landing was fake but professional wrestling is real. One wrestling participant said it is real in the sense that it's entertainment and the person who entertains the best wins. Forbes reported last year the highest paid professional wrestler was John Cena who took in nearly $10 million. I'm almost certain they didn't pay him with Monopoly money, (fake). I know my grandfather used to take out some of his frustration while watching the bad guys, (The Ruskies, the Japs, the Germans), get beat up by the USA flag waving heroes. Harmless fun? My guess is that if you don't take it too seriously it probably won't do that much damage. As for those with all the banners who have lost their voices screaming, well, maybe some kind of hotline might be made available to offer them help. What about my enjoyment of NASCAR? The old saying applies: That question implies that you have now stopped preaching and you've begun to meddle. Take care. Enjoy. And, may God add His blessings to our day. Amen. ....More later.

Caution: It's not the mirror that adds all those years to your image.

It's Wednesday, March 29, 2017, and I send out a hearty hello to everyone joining today's episode. I think we all have, at one time or another, had that cold water in the face wake up call during our sojourn here on the planet. It is a part of life, especially as you get up there in years. My wife will soon be 70 years young. While that seems impossible, I can truly say that she carries her years as well as anyone I know. She continues to be a beautiful woman. The other day someone put a posting up on Facebook. It had some people in a photo. One of the people in that photo was a lady that I had a crush on as a freshman in high school. I had to check closely to make sure that was the girl that used to cause my knees to wobble. I suppose I had the image of her putting her books away stuck in my mind. I last saw this lady in 1978 at the visitation to honor my baby sister who had passed away. Even in 1978, she had changed a lot from what I remember in 1961, but, fast forward to 2017, and how she looks today was hard for me to take in. I'm not knocking her. It's the reality of life, however, it did take me a few seconds to realize this is what the aging process does. Let me make it a little more clear. When I saw that picture my first thought was that she reminded me of my grandmother. And, with the same breath, I have to know that someone might be saying the same about me. Whatever happened to that boy? He looks like my grandfather. Or, better yet, if I didn't know better I would think he has become Santa Claus. As the old comedian used to say, "I resemble that remark."

I do have before and after photos but I wouldn't even think of sharing them. Not even with the disclaimer that said the names have been changed to protect the innocent. My beard, now white naturally, covers up a lot of wear and tear, along with the ravages of having made it to my present age. Then we have the fantasy versus reality issue. People buy a new dress or a new suit and when they wear them they have a mental view of how it makes them look. How we think we look doesn't always square with how we actually look. A number of years ago they came out with a mirror that was expensive but it used technology to show someone a realistic view of themselves. It made a big splash but I don't hear much about them anymore. Maybe we don't want to have a more realistic view of our appearance. I worked with a fellow once that had achieved a fairly high position, but, he had trouble speaking in front of audiences. Our Company bought out another smaller firm and we had to fly to their headquarters and speak to the staff there. He represented our technology group. He told me that he had bought a new suit because it was one of the only things that helped prepare himself to speak. I'm not being cruel here but the suit didn't help him at all. He could have saved the $500 and done the same lousy job. The good news is that God doesn't judge us based on what we look like, He loves each of us in the frame that we have. He proved His love by sending His Son to die on our behalf. We don't need to figure out ways to pump up our self-esteem, we need to learn how to live out a life reflecting our esteemed identity in Christ. I know. A little preachy at the end, but, that's how it came out.

All of that from the photo of an aging lady posted on Facebook? I suppose I am in good company since I might be reflecting the great insights given by Vice President Dan Quayle, "What a terrible thing to have lost one's mind. Or not to have a mind at all. How true that is." My wife is out of town. She is over in Louisiana helping to care for my mom. (Maybe part of her beauty is found in her servant's heart.) You may know that old adage, "When the wife is away all bets are off." You never heard that one? I'm not sure I have either, but, her being gone might help to explain my scrambled prose of late. Don't blame it on her? I tell you all the time, this is a tough audience. I suppose I should be glad I'm not close enough to get all that fruit thrown at me. Just joking. I had better quit before I get even further behind. I do hope you will have yourself a great rest of today. May God bless us all is my prayer. Amen. ....More later.

The late Andre Crouch's great song, "Through it all, through it all, I've learned to trust in Jesus, I've learned to trust in God. Through it all, through it all, I've learned to depend upon His Word."

Last Saturday.

I suppose Sonny and Cher's big hit from 1967 made a point, "The Beat Goes On." Another day has dawned and we wake up to all that it holds for us. This one happens to be cataloged as Tuesday, March 28, 2017. The beat does go on, but I'm aware that it is only by the grace and provision of God. Not in some morbid or fatalistic way, but, it's a realistic view based on trust and confidence in our God. This is true, by the way, even when I'm so distracted by all that is happening, I fail to fully appreciate His abiding presence. I had many hours of conversation with mom last Saturday. She was remembering a whole lot of history. She struggles to make sense of her situation. I told her that whatever this life brings, regardless of how challenging, it is working for our good. This is what God has given to us, "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28) She is one of God's own, therefore, this verse is for her, for me, and for every other person saved by the power of God. I couldn't delineate the actual good things that are being achieved by the very challenging health issues she is dealing with. But, I do know that verse is true, therefore, we know that good is being accomplished. For her. Some people misread that verse and their reading comes out giving the impression that it's all good things. Nope. That's not even close. All things. Good, bad, indifferent, no matter what, they work for good to my mom who loves God and she is called according to His purpose. Amen. 

On my journey early Saturday morning over to Louisiana to visit mom and dad I had to deal with the traffic that showed up to run alongside me, run over me, hold me up, or a lot of other things to mess with my mind. There's a long stretch that is two lanes only, except for a few spots where an additional lane has been added so folks can pass the slower traffic. When I hit the long stretch of two lane I saw a pretty sad sight up ahead. It was a convoy following one of those super sized 18 wheelers headed to the big box store in Jasper, Texas, about an hour away. The speed limit is 75 but riding behind that truck put me at about 60 or less when the big truck went up a hill. Finally, we came upon one of those additional passing lane places. Thank the Lord! There was only one problem. The first car behind the truck must get into the other lane and speed up. She did. But not fast enough. She was essentially riding beside the big truck at about the same speed. The convoy was behind her. We all let out a collective sigh when the lane ended and we all had to get back into line behind the big truck. I called the wife and told her what had happened. I think she may have said, "Bless her heart." Okay. That was a nice sentiment, but, that one didn't come to me when I was thinking about her passing approach. Just so you know, I did reach a spot and I passed them all. How fast? That information is currently unavailable, but, I will tell you my old pickup shuddered a little as we did our slingshot. (Hint: You learn a lot by watching NASCAR.)

Settle down. Don't be forming a posse to come and serve me a notice of citizen's arrest. I'm sure I may have embellished that account just a tad. Well, maybe a smidgen. Or, would you believe a teeny tiny bit? I didn't even mention the rain storm and bad visibility, but, they didn't seem to add anything to my story. I had better move on before my phone lights up with messages from 'you know who'. I think my little experience is covered under the covenant that says, "What happens on US Route 190 stays on Route 190." What? You never heard of that one? All I can say is you need to get out more. I feel compelled to confess something. I sometimes come up behind a person on the roadway and I can't help but think, "My oh my, isn't it just my luck to end up behind someone observing all the traffic signs?" If it helps any, I typically feel bad after thinking something like that. Whew! Being me really tires me out. I guess I had better quit for today so I can spend some time in reflection or deflection, I forget which one. Take care. Enjoy the rest of your day. May God bless each one is my prayer. Amen. ....More later.

Blessed beyond measure with the family I became a member of when I married.

Remembering Mom Rawles

Good morning out there wherever you happen to be situated on that expansive, all-inclusive, world wide web superhighway. You didn't sign up to be on that highway? Sorry. I think everyone gets to be on it these days, by default. The old song said, "There's an all-seeing eye watching you." It was referencing our Creator God. I think an attempt to duplicate that ability might be a part of this technological marvel where we can be found and identified, literally, pretty much wherever we happen to be on the globe. That might be a little over the top, but, not much. At any rate, I do bid you welcome to today, Monday, March 27, 2017. Yesterday would have been my mother-in-law's 100th birthday. She left this world to enter her eternal bliss back in 1998. She was a part of my interconnected family for nearly 35 years. She was a remarkable woman. Simple. Unassuming. A pastor's wife. A prolific writer of letters, quips, and poems. A master at sewing. A musician and lover of Gospel songs. A devoted believer in her God. A housewife, and simple but interesting cook who always took care of her family. She had a quirky sense of humor and she did like a good laugh. Those of us fortunate enough to be in her sphere had no qualms at all in associating her with the spiritual giant of a woman described in Proverbs 31. Her children have continued to mirror many of her traits. They have carried on the legacy she laid out before them. I come away thinking how blessed I am to have been loved, mothered, and prayed for by her. May God bless her memory as we think about her impact on all our lives. Amen.

When you get our age, there's value in knowing what you like. And, what you don't. We are popcorn eaters. From way back. Not the microwave stuff. Not the flavored junk. Natural. A number of years ago my gastroenterologist advised me to stop eating popcorn because of her fear it might lead to diverticulitis. No more popcorn! Several years later I confronted her with an article I had read that said researchers had discovered that popcorn was not the threat they had previously thought. She casually said, "Yeah, that's right. You can eat all of it that you want." I am glad they didn't have an exit window on that floor. I probably would have busted through it and landed two stories down on the ground. I could hear Happy Days are Here Again playing in my mind. You remember that one. No? That's the one they played when Prohibition officially ended. I think. At any rate, I was happy. I am the official corn popper in our house and I use an old worn out pressure cooker on the stovetop. I think we mostly use the best stuff that has Orville Redenbacher's name on it. Recently, we began to run low on the seasoning salt we use. The wife searched all around for it but couldn't find it. She bought several that were supposed to be similar. They weren't. We are serious about our popcorn. She sent me a picture. I found the company and special ordered four bottles. She asked why four. I told her the shipping cost was fixed and it was nearly as much as the products, therefore, we now have some extra in reserve. That should be about a six year supply. Now everything is right with the world. She chunked the other stuff. Good girl. Thank You, Lord. Amen. 

What's that? You hope that was a joke? I report, you decide, but always remember there are things that are no laughing matter to yours truly, and, popcorn happens to be one of them. I can remember sharing a dishpan of the fluffy kernels with my Granny Mac. She too was serious about her popcorn. You know. It was something to enjoy together as we watched Sid Caesar's 'Your Show of Shows'. Did I hear someone say that explains a lot? Maybe you could let me know because it might clear up some things for me. However, I'm sure those sweet memories are a part of the program as well. Okay, enough of that. I did visit mom on Saturday. She is making it but with much distress and difficulty. The wife stayed to help out some. I pray that God will work His will according to His love, mercy, and grace. These series of events have also taken a toll on dad, her primary caretaker. I ask for your continued prayers. I could sure eat a dishpan of popcorn right now. Something must have made me think of it. I do hope you have a most wonderful day and may our Great God add His blessings to it. Amen. ....More later.