“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” —Ann Landers

Mr. Bentley, Neighborhood Inspection Chief. 

Hello and welcome. It is Thursday, October 3, 2019, and I do hope everyone is ready to embrace the day before us. I do have plenty of stuff I have to deal with. You did know that. Right? The other day I went to the groomer to pick up Mr. Bentley. After I paid the cashier, they brought him out. He is always glad to see me, but, this time he had something stuck on top of his head. I asked them if there was a problem. They said no. I asked why he had something blue stuck on his head. They said it is a blue bow and they asked, "He is a boy, right?" I said, "Yes, he is, and I don't want any bow stuck on his head. Please get it off. Now!" One of the ladies in the background tossed out, "I guess you are not into the metrosexual look." First of all, I had no idea what that meant but I did announce to them all, "I only want my Mr. Bentley-look, nothing more, nothing less, thank you very much." They all seemed to think it was funny. I didn't. As if that wasn't enough, I learned first hand why 70% of all car accidents happen within 15 miles of a person's residence. The other morning I was taking Mr. Bentley for his morning inspection tour of the neighborhood. He hangs his head out of my truck window and checks on everything in a 25-30 block trip. The first incident occurred when a lady in a small SUV was meeting us on the road. She was halfway over on my side of the road. I moved as far left as I could. When I got closer I could see she was on her cell phone. She looked up, saw me, and swerved her car back onto her side. Just before we got back to the house, another lady was turning onto the street we were on. I was near to the intersection and she turned right and made a huge swing left, putting her directly in my lane. I slowed to a near stop and she finally got over to her side and went on like nothing had happened. I mentioned to Mr. Bentley that our little ride alongs are getting quite dangerous. He looked up at me, hung his head back out the window as if to say, "You can drive on now." See what I mean? Not so easy. Right, Buckwheat?

I am scheduled in the morning for an ultrasound screening to examine something called an abdominal aorta aneurysm. My doctor thought it would be good to check this since I had been a previous smoker. I quit smoking over 50 years ago. Oh well, if it needs to be checked, then, so be it. When I was reading about it on the web I saw something that was interesting. It essentially said that if you were to have this artery rupture, you likely wouldn't have to worry about it since it is doubtful you would even make it to the hospital. We were riding along, the wife was driving and I told her what it said. For some reason, I thought it was slightly humorous. It's like one of those 'if you can read this you are about to crash' kinds of warnings. It turned out I didn't need the injection I went to the clinic for on Wednesday. They had indicated I needed it because I had not had one since 1965. But, truth is, I did have one in 2012 and they do last for 10 years. Even I can do the math on that one. The immunization nurse said the automated program that helps do preemptive care does not always get it right. She then told me I need not worry because she was going to correct the record and also she would not be charging me for our time together. I thanked her politely, but, I later told the wife I would like to have seen her try to charge me anything for a mistake they made and what about any reimbursement for my time and mileage? I still think it is best to be nice to the person who does the jabbing with a needle.

Our neighbor across the street has put out their Halloween decorations. Some tombstones, some skeletons, and some weird projections of images including a huge jack-o-lantern. When I carried Mr. Bentley out around 9:45 p.m., we went out the front door, and it was the first time he had seen this newly constructed stuff across the street. He didn't really know what to make of it. He is a very intent watcher. He sat down and stared for a couple of minutes. Finally, he had seen enough and we went about our business. He does recognize when something is different. One day we walked down to the corner and someone had taped a sign about a missing pet on the stop sign. Mr. Bentley thought something was wrong and he started growling and barking. Silly little dog. Maybe he knew the pet that was missing. Oh well, I think you can see the challenges I have each day. My grandfather used to tell me because I sometimes wouldn't stay focused, that I woke up in a new world every few minutes. Between Mr. Bentley and me, we do have our struggles. Truth be known, not so much. It's more or less the same for everyone. We just like making more of it than we should. Take care, now, you hear? And, may God bless each one. Amen. ....More later.